Are We Quick to Judge?

What do we do when someone who is sick decides to hide her diagnosis from everyone around her? When my friend was diagnosed with a late stage of a rare cancer, we all noticed her behavior changed. She changed from a social butterfly to an isolated individual from her closest friends and loved ones. Not only did her new behavior make things more challenging for herself by leaving her with little support, but it also denied her family members—who had become her caregivers—the support they needed. Most of the time, she was in good spirits and acted as if life was normal. However, on bad days, pain and fatigue drained her energy. She is an intelligent person with more knowledge about the medical field than the average person. She had always followed a healthy diet, exercised regularly, and supplemented her body with herbs and a holistic lifestyle. She was probably more shocked than anyone by her diagnosis! Why was she hiding her experience from others? What was going through her mind? This behavior continued for months after her diagnosis. No one could call or visit her. She refused all contact. Only her primary caregivers were allowed to help her with treatments and doctor appointments. Caring for a loved one who is sick is not an easy task. It comes with a flood of emotions and guilt. Watching her deteriorate took a toll on her children. They decided to share her diagnosis with close family members, such as cousins and aunts/uncles, under the condition that no one contact her directly. Instead, they would receive updates about her progress to ease their worry and sadness. This act of sharing provided much-needed support for her children. Even if it was just phone calls, they felt loved and cared for. They began having honest conversations with their mom. Without overwhelming her with the prognosis, they expressed their concerns about how the disease was progressing despite treatments. They spent quality time with her, showing their true love and care. Weeks later, my friend found the courage to call some of her best friends. She talked for hours, explaining her situation in the positive light she chose to see. She later told her daughters that talking about her illness helped her return to reality and confront the harsh truth. She had created a bubble for herself to stay calm and collected. The thought of dying scared her. She knew she might not beat this monster, but she was trying to live as normally as possible by continuing her routine. We can all judge her behavior endlessly. But the fact remains: it is her right to choose how she wants to cope with her disease. This is a journey that no one can walk for her, and she knows it. A journey where she rethinks every experience, questions her lifestyle, feels guilt for roads not taken, and seeks forgiveness. She is going through so much on her own; who are we to expect more from her? Why can’t we let her be in these final moments of her life? Most likely, her worries are far greater than whether others know about her diagnosis. Let’s give her the space and respect she deserves. She has already lost her independence and privacy. What more could we demand of her? Let’s show her love and compassion by abiding by her rules. Maybe ask her: What can we do to ease her burden on this journey? If she doesn’t seek companionship, what else might bring her joy? The next time you hear about someone’s diagnosis, put yourself in their shoes. Ask yourself: If this were me, how would I react? The next time you hear about someone’s diagnosis, put yourself in their shoes. Ask yourself: If this were me, how would I react? Namaste, Shab

8 Surprising Strategies for Phone Freedom

Reducing screen time on phones presents a considerable challenge due to their design to captivate attention and stimulate dopamine responses. Acknowledging this difficulty is crucial, as it entails more than mere willpower but rather a complex interaction with technology. Recognizing the desire to spend less time on phones is a positive step, indicating a readiness to change and improve habits. Instead of solely focusing on restriction, it’s beneficial to identify personal motivations or “whys” behind wanting to reduce screen time, such as being more present in relationships or achieving professional goals. Practical strategies like enabling grayscale mode, silencing notifications, or physically distancing oneself from the phone can reduce its allure. These methods disrupt habitual behaviors and diminish the immediate gratification phone use is associated with. Intentionally organizing apps or removing social media apps entirely can limit distractions and promote mindfulness. Experimenting with using a secondary “dumb phone” provides a gradual transition away from smartphone dependence, fostering a healthier relationship with technology. Understanding the impact of excessive phone use on mental health is crucial. Social media, in particular, can contribute to anxiety, comparison, and depression for some individuals. Therefore, selectively removing social media apps from phones or restricting their usage to computer platforms can mitigate these negative effects. Balancing the benefits and drawbacks of smartphone usage is essential; while phones offer convenience and connectivity, over-reliance can lead to imbalance and interpersonal issues.

Get Ahead of the Curve! Early Screening for Colorectal Cancer

Colorectal cancer rates have been steadily increasing among young people in the United States, with cases in individuals aged 55 and under rising from 11% in 1995 to 20% in 2019. Notably, colorectal cancer has become the leading cause of cancer death in men under 50 and the second leading cause in women under 50. Despite this trend, current guidelines from the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention recommend screening only for adults aged 45 to 75, primarily through colonoscopy, considered the “gold standard” for detection. However, experts argue that waiting until age 45 for screening might be too late for many individuals, especially those with certain symptoms or risk factors. Symptoms such as blood in the stool, persistent bowel changes, sudden abdominal pain, unexplained weight loss, or a family history of colorectal cancer should prompt earlier screening. For individuals with a family history, particularly if a first-degree relative was diagnosed before age 50, screening should start at least a decade before the age of the affected family member. Other risk factors that warrant earlier screening include inflammatory bowel disease, iron deficiency anemia (especially in men), personal history of colorectal cancer, or certain genetic mutations associated with cancer. These conditions increase the likelihood of developing colorectal cancer and necessitate proactive screening measures. Colonoscopies can detect and remove precancerous polyps, significantly reducing the risk of developing colorectal cancer. While colonoscopies are considered the most effective screening method, alternatives such as fecal tests and CT scans are available for individuals who are hesitant about or unable to undergo a colonoscopy. However, adherence to screening guidelines remains crucial, as early detection significantly improves outcomes. Despite the availability of screening options, a considerable portion of the population remains unscreened, highlighting the importance of raising awareness and promoting proactive healthcare practices. The rise in colorectal cancer rates among young people underscores the urgency of taking personal and family health history seriously. While experiencing symptoms outlined above doesn’t necessarily indicate colorectal cancer, they warrant medical evaluation, including consideration of a colonoscopy. Maintaining vigilance over one’s health and advocating for appropriate screening can lead to early detection, prevention, and potentially life-saving interventions.

Secrets from the Serving Side

In today’s dining scene, there has been a noticeable shift from rigid etiquette norms towards a more relaxed atmosphere, allowing for a more enjoyable dining experience. Insights from a former restaurant worker and a seasoned waitress shed light on this evolving dynamic. Despite the decline in fine dining establishments, certain guidelines remain essential for ensuring a smooth and pleasant dining experience for patrons and staff. Phone usage is a significant aspect of modern dining etiquette. While using phones is acceptable, excessive usage can impede communication and detract from the dining experience. Furthermore, excessive photo-taking can disrupt service and compromise food quality, particularly in upscale restaurants. Advising against such behavior helps maintain the ambiance and ensures a pleasant experience for all diners. Consideration of the workload of the staff is essential when placing orders. Patrons should refrain from excessive demands for samples or substitutions, as these can strain servers and disrupt the dining flow. Understanding the limitations of the “customer is always right” mentality is crucial, as respecting the establishment’s policies ensures a harmonious dining experience for all parties involved. Settling the bill should be done thoughtfully, accounting for the staff’s workload. Simplifying the payment process by avoiding splitting the bill with multiple cards is advisable, especially during peak hours. By communicating preferences early on and being mindful of the staff’s efforts, patrons can contribute to a smooth and efficient dining experience. Overall, adherence to these guidelines fosters a pleasant dining environment, promoting enjoyment for both patrons and staff without the need for specific names.

The Secret Playbook of Job Interview Success

The article discusses seven unspoken job interview rules that can significantly benefit job candidates. These rules shed light on the often mysterious hiring process and provide insights into how to navigate interviews effectively. The first rule emphasizes the importance of presenting a “highlight reel” of your career rather than an exhaustive list of experiences when asked about yourself. This concise approach is crucial in time-restricted interviews, allowing candidates to address other questions effectively. Rule number two underscores the significance of understanding the roles of individual interviewers. Tailoring responses to their specific concerns and expectations can enhance your candidacy. For example, a peer may focus on collaboration and teamwork, while a manager may prioritize your ability to make independent decisions. The third rule highlights the role of body language in interviews. Effective communication extends beyond words, with body language playing a vital role in conveying your engagement and active listening skills. Rule four encourages candidates to prepare multiple career stories to share during interviews. Having a repertoire of success stories to rotate among interviewers can make you a stronger candidate and prevent redundancy. Rule five addresses the frustrating issue of post-interview silence. It clarifies that follow-up emails or nudges are unlikely to expedite the decision-making process, and silence may indicate waitlisting. The sixth rule discusses the practice of sending thank-you notes after interviews. While these notes can be beneficial for networking, they are rarely the deciding factor in a candidate’s selection. The penultimate rule advises job seekers not to accept a job without speaking to current or former employees who can provide insights into the company’s culture, management, and work environment. In conclusion, these unspoken rules demystify job interviews and provide valuable guidance to candidates. By focusing on a highlight reel, tailoring responses, mastering body language, sharing multiple career stories, understanding the post-interview silence, treating thank-you notes appropriately, and seeking input from peers, candidates can navigate interviews more effectively and make informed decisions about their prospective employers.

Finding the Perfect Age for Solo Halloween Adventures

The decision of when kids should be allowed to trick or treat without an adult is a matter of judgment that depends on various factors. Here are some key considerations to help you determine if your child is ready to go trick-or-treating without adult supervision: Age: The general consensus is that around the age of 12 is an appropriate time to let kids trick-or-treat alone. However, every child is different, and some may be ready earlier, while others might need more time. Safety Concerns: Consider the safety concerns in your neighborhood. Are there sidewalks, streetlights, and low traffic? If your area has limited visibility and high traffic, it might be safer for kids to be accompanied by an adult. Visibility: Make sure your child is easily visible to drivers and other pedestrians. Use flashlights, glow sticks, reflective tape, and other visible accessories to ensure they can be seen in the dark. Costume Safety: Ensure that your child’s costume is safe and doesn’t pose a tripping or falling hazard. Choose flame-resistant fabrics and comfortable shoes to prevent injuries. Practice Run: Take a practice run with your child before Halloween night to familiarize them with the route, streetlights, and safe street crossings. Set a curfew for their return. Communication: Both you and your child should have a way to communicate. Consider giving them a cell phone or a smartwatch, but remind them to be mindful of their surroundings and not get too distracted by technology. Safety in Numbers: Encourage your child to go trick-or-treating with a group of friends or siblings, as being in a group can enhance safety. Knowing the Area: Make sure your child knows the area and the neighborhood. Teach them to only visit houses with their outside lights on and to never enter anyone’s home, yard, or car. Developmental Age: Consider your child’s developmental age, not just their chronological age. Some children may know the area but might not be developmentally mature enough to make decisions in challenging situations. Safety Concepts: Discuss basic personal safety concepts with your child, such as how to deal with “tricky people” and when to call for help. Have a code word or emoji they can use to signal if they need assistance. Ultimately, the decision should be based on your child’s individual readiness and your comfort level as a parent. You can also take gradual steps to increase their independence, such as allowing them to visit houses while you remain on the sidewalk or only letting them trick-or-treat on one side of the street until they are more comfortable. Safety is paramount, so ensure that your child is well-prepared and understands the rules and expectations before going out on Halloween night.

Navigating Pet Etiquette with Finesse

Cat and dog

Interacting with other people’s pets requires etiquette and consideration to maintain a positive experience and avoid rudeness. Always seek permission from the pet owner before touching their animal, as it’s a matter of common courtesy and safety. Not all pets are friendly, and even small dogs can potentially nip or bite. Additionally, never assume it’s acceptable to feed someone else’s pet without consulting the owner, as it may disrupt their training or cause dietary issues. Avoid making negative comments about someone’s pet or their choices as a pet owner, and refrain from giving unsolicited advice about a pet’s behavior or medical condition. Always supervise your children when they interact with someone else’s pet and teach them to ask for permission and be gentle to avoid causing harm. Never give medication, supplements, or any substances to someone else’s pet without the owner’s prior approval, as it can have adverse effects. Respect the boundaries of other pet owners by not forcing your own pet onto theirs. Maintain a safe distance between pets when walking them and seek permission from the other owner before introducing your pet. Never assume how someone else’s pet will react; be mindful of their body language and let the pet initiate contact. Avoid asking about the cost of the pet, as it’s a personal matter similar to inquiring about someone’s financial details. When visiting a home with a pet, do not request the host to create their animal unless there are valid medical concerns or allergies. Respect the pet’s personal space to prevent stress or aggression. Always avoid behaviors that could physically harm the pet, such as smoking near birds or lifting dogs improperly. When taking photos or videos of someone else’s pet, ask for permission first. Lastly, never pet or play with a service dog unless specifically invited, as these animals are working and any distraction could endanger the person they are assisting.

A Guide to Staying Safe and Cozy in Extreme Winter Conditions

The article addresses the health risks associated with winter storms, noting that death rates in the United States increase by 8% to 12% during winter months, with over 19,000 Americans having died from cold-related causes since 1979. This surge is attributed to seasonal changes in behavior, increased exposure to respiratory diseases, and the impact on the human body. Special attention is given to vulnerable populations, including infants and older adults, who struggle to maintain core body temperatures. Recommendations include ensuring infants sleep in warm rooms and checking on older neighbors to guarantee adequate heating. The risk of hypothermia rises when indoor temperatures fall below 50 degrees for an extended period. Indoor safety measures are emphasized, particularly the avoidance of carbon monoxide poisoning. The article advises against using generators, grills, or stoves indoors, stressing the importance of carbon monoxide detectors when using heaters. Using the kitchen stove for heat is discouraged, with alternatives like extra blankets, sleeping bags, or well-maintained fireplaces suggested. Outdoor safety measures involve avoiding travel on icy roads and, if stranded outdoors, staying inside the vehicle to prevent hypothermia. Outdoor activities, such as shoveling snow, should be performed slowly, and individuals participating in outdoor recreation are encouraged to travel in pairs with emergency kits and cell phones. The risks of frostbite and hypothermia are highlighted, with recommendations to limit outdoor exposure, dress in warm layers, and take immediate care, such as immersion in warm water, in case of frostbite. Moisturizing is emphasized to prevent dry and cracked skin during extremely cold temperatures, particularly for those with winter-related skin conditions. The impact of cold weather on respiratory health is discussed, with colder, drier air potentially causing complications for individuals with respiratory illnesses. The article underscores the importance of annual vaccinations, such as flu and Covid-19 shots, to prevent respiratory issues. Finally, cardiovascular risks associated with frosty weather are addressed, especially for individuals with heart conditions. Recommendations include avoiding strenuous activities like snow shoveling and exercising too much, as a drop in temperature has been associated with an increased risk of heart attack. Overall, the article provides comprehensive guidance on staying healthy and safe during winter storms.

Navigating Anxiety: 6 Habits to Dodge for a Lighter Mind

This article delves into common behaviors and thought patterns that contribute to anxiety while offering practical strategies to address them. The comparison is drawn between anxiety and a smoke alarm, signaling potential danger but sometimes going off unnecessarily. Natasha Reynolds, a psychotherapist, suggests that when the anxiety “smoke alarm” activates frequently for non-threatening situations, seeking support and developing coping tools becomes crucial. The first identified behavior is black-and-white thinking, where situations are perceived as either entirely good or bad without acknowledging gray areas. Avoidance is highlighted as a counterproductive habit that exacerbates anxiety, contrary to the common belief that it provides relief. Instead, therapists recommend incrementally approaching challenging situations to build resilience. Seeking reassurance, a behavior involving constant validation from others or online searches is identified as a contributor to long-term anxiety. Catastrophizing, imagining worst-case scenarios, is addressed by challenging these thoughts and considering practical coping mechanisms. Negative self-talk, characterized by harsh self-criticism, is highlighted as a significant factor in increasing anxiety. People-pleasing, prioritizing others’ needs over one’s own, is recognized as a common habit that leads to anxiety and poor self-worth. The article suggests grounding skills like going for a walk and mindfulness practices to alleviate anxiety. Belly breathing is recommended as a technique to promote calmness. Naming negative thought patterns when they occur and being mindful of them can help individuals distance themselves from these unhelpful patterns. Lastly, the article emphasizes seeking professional help, such as psychotherapy, as a powerful tool to understand deeper emotions underlying anxiety. It suggests that anxiety may be a secondary emotion covering up others deemed unacceptable, and therapy can provide valuable insights into one’s emotions and behaviors. Overall, the article encourages individuals to recognize these anxiety-inducing habits, develop coping mechanisms, and seek support when needed.

Navigating Holiday Travel with Wrapped Gifts

Couple traveling with gifts

The COVID-19 pandemic has led to changes in Christmas plans, but holiday travel remains significant, with the Transportation Security Administration screening over 2 million passengers daily, nearly double compared to the previous year. Flying during the holidays presents challenges, especially when it comes to carrying gifts. Logistical concerns include finding space in suitcases, securely packing gifts to avoid damage, and whether it’s acceptable to fly with wrapped presents. According to travel preparedness expert Cheryl Nelson, while there are no explicit restrictions on gift wrapping, TSA advises against it. Wrapped gifts may be unwrapped during security inspections, causing delays and potential issues for both carry-on and checked luggage. To avoid complications, travel experts suggest alternative packing methods, such as gift bags or boxes that TSA agents can easily open if necessary. It is recommended to save the actual gift wrapping for the destination to prevent delays. Those who insist on wrapping gifts before air travel might consider sending them separately via mail to the destination to avoid potential inconveniences at airport security. Travelers should know TSA regulations for all packed items, including gifts. Checking the TSA homepage and the “What can I bring?” section provides the most up-to-date guidance on permissible items. Considerations extend to packing supplies, with craft scissors only allowed in checked luggage. If needed at the destination, borrowing scissors is a viable option. Considerations extend to packinSpecial attention is given to snow globes, considered liquids by TSA. Snow globes larger than 3.4 ounces may be confiscated, so packing them in bubble wrap in checked luggage is recommended. Additionally, travelers are reminded to adhere to COVID-19 precautions, including wearing masks, practicing hand hygiene, maintaining distance, and avoiding travel if unwell.g supplies, with craft scissors only allowed in checked luggage. If needed at the destination, borrowing scissors is a viable option. Special attention is given to snow globes, considered liquids by TSA. Snow globes larger than 3.4 ounces may be confiscated, so packing them in bubble wrap in checked luggage is recommended. Additionally, travelers are reminded to adhere to COVID-19 precautions, including wearing masks, practicing hand hygiene, maintaining distance, and avoiding travel if unwell.